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Couples Therapy for One

If your partner has the same degree of enthusiasm for couples therapy you have, please see this page — Couples Therapy

HOWEVER: If you’re despairing because your relationship’s in trouble and your partner

• Won’t acknowledge there’s anything wrong
• Believes the problems are all your fault
• States categorically that couples’ therapy “isn’t on”
• Has attended one or two sessions with you and won’t go back

...there’s hope

A first principle of Systems theory holds that change in one part of a system creates change in other parts.

This means that one committed person can learn to change the way their couple relates.

When I started to see Susan I was really stressed. I was working long and hard. My marriage was near dissolution.  I thought I had no control over my life. My sessions with Susan opened my eyes to what I really wanted for myself and my life.  I knew my husband and I wanted children, however I did not want to repeat my parents’ mistakes and have a very strained relationship with my children.

Through Susan I was able to understand my childhood and my relationship with my parents and sister and how they had formed the person I was.  I was able to see that I was in control of my destiny.  Through communication I could work on all my relationships. Being a “yes” person and always trying to please, I realised it was OK to say “NO!” and, in fact, healthy for all if I did so.  It took time and effort but I’m proud to say I have a strong healthy marriage and a beautiful baby girl and am now in control of my life.

Project Manager, 29

Working with Tony or Susan you can discover how to

• Stop blaming, inflaming and prolonging conflict
• Become more proficient at analysing and understanding your relationship and its patterns
• Recognise and change your own contribution when things aren’t working
• Upgrade your emotional intelligence – contain and express your feelings in ways that enhance rather than undermine intimacy
• Listen, empathise and take your partner’s perspective
• Become a clearer, more assertive and skilled communicator
• “Self soothe” or “hang on to yourself” when the heat’s on
• Brush up your conflict resolving and negotiation skills
• Set the scene for more mutual respect, co-operation and teamwork

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